Just Yesterday It Was Spotless
Thursday, September 1, 2011
burghbaby

Have you ever dreamed of owning a pink polka dotted car? Yes? Man, have I got a deal for you!

What's that? You don't see the polka dots? Welp, they are most certainly there!

And hooboy! They sure are pink!

They're a very lovely shade of Pepto Bismol pink, in fact. But don't worry! They aren't Pepto Bismol. No, that is latex paint all over Mr. Husband's car, so you won't have to worry about your pretty polka dots washing off of your new car! So lucky!

If you aren't following me on twitter, you're probably wondering how we got so lucky and scored such a "festive" paint job. Perhaps I should let a little note explain why my husband drove home with a windshield so covered in pink paint that he could barely see.

I must be nice or something because I blurred the name and phone number.

Obviously, Mr. Husband didn't witness the Great Pink Paint Explosion of 2011, but he did talk to someone who saw the whole thing happen. It seems that some people were cleaning up a parking lot and found themselves with a wee bit of a problem when some paint cans exploded. Everywhere.

They did the only logical thing and tried to wipe the paint off.

Which, of course, didn't work. So they wrote a note, stuck it on the windshield, and ran for their lives. The note blew off of the car since they didn't secure it with the (paint-covered) windshield wiper, but fortunately the guys who saw it all happen chased down the note and put it back on the car. They then waited around until Mr. Husband showed up, I bet because they thought they would get to see a fun show.

They saw a fun show all right. The husband is a wee bit cranky that his car looks like Alexis decorated it.

So, let's review. For some reason, there were cans of bright pink paint sitting in a City parking lot. Perhaps leftovers from the latest remodel in the Mayor's office? Maybe Britney Spears left them there when she was in town a few weeks ago? Maybe it isn't actually paint but really Care Bear blood and that parking lot is a burial ground for a Care Bear hating maniac? I'm not sure, but my money is on Mayor Lukey having something to do with it.

The contact listed on the note was long gone for the day by the time Mr. Husband tried to call (I need a job with a City contractor--working 7-3:30 sounds heavenly), so we have no idea how the whole thing is going to get resolved. I do know that there is no way in hell the husband will be cleaning it because there is paint in every nook and cranny of that car, and he doesn't have the time to dedicate to the torture that's going to be involved with scrubbing and scrubbing and hoping not to damage the clear coat.

And to think, that wasn't even the most annoying thing that happened today. The Winner of that contest has a little something to do with kindergarten and how the best laid plans never quite work the way I want them to. I'll be back with that story sooner or later. First I have to go see if I can make the pink polka dots run away if I glare at them meanly.

Article originally appeared on burgh baby (http://www.theburghbaby.com/).
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