The Sarcastic Apple Fell From The Sarcastic Tree

It was late last week when Alexis sprung it on me. She had a homework project due the very next day and she hadn't started yet. As luck would have it, it was one of those homework projects that is more an assignment for the parents than it is the kid. She had tried to start it a week before and hadn't gotten very far because assignment for the parents, thank you very much. She couldn't do it without help.

So we pulled out the assignment and started trying to throw it together very quickly. The assignment was to make a timeline of her life and HELLO I HAVE A BLOG FOR THAT. If ever there has been a time when Alexis has gotten to see firsthand the convenience that is involved with having your life more or less documented, that was it. We found the approximate date when she first walked, first talked, started dance class, went to Disney World, and all kinds of other things. Then we printed out photos to go with every milestone.

As we were working on the assignment (every time I say "we," you should picture me with a mouse in my pocket because Alexis sure as hell wasn't doing any helping), Alexis was being ... crazy. Nutty. Silly. She was declaring herself SO ADORABLE every time she saw an old photo of her and was going on and on and on. Words. Lots of them. All of them. YOU CAN'T HAVE ANY WORDS BECAUSE SHE TOOK THEM ALL.

So I turned to Alexis and said, "Seriously, girlfriend. Simmer down."

Alexis turned to me and deadpanned, "But mom! Why can't I be myself?"

It felt like a trap. That didn't stop me from continuing, "You are being obnoxious."

"Mom, obnoxious is my thing," she replied with a grin on her face.

We marked February 14th down as the day that Alexis first demonstrated an effective use of sarcasm. Obviously.

Taming the Boredom Monster

I fully admit that I am a mess when I’m sick. I don’t get a lot of practice, so I’ve never quite figured out how to quietly rest without making everyone around me miserable. There is whining and complaining I generally just feel the need to bring everyone down to my level of pitifulness.

Alexis is, in many ways, my clone. She doesn’t get sick often and when she does? LOOK OUT. The whining flies around all over the room as she tries to continue on with life just like normal and discovers that it’s not possible. She doesn’t figure out that she should just sit her butt down on the couch and relax. She wants to GO! GO! GO!

That means it’s up to me to find a way to occupy her mentally while keeping her calm physically. If I play my cards right, I can keep the Boredom Monster at bay while getting snuggled for hours. Which, sitting on the couch getting snuggled by a little girl? Not a bad way to spend a day! AT ALL!

The last time I wrote a post for Children's Mucinex, I asked y’all what you do to keep your sickies entertained. Y’all came up with some great ideas including:

• Keeping a stash of coloring books and a new box of crayons just for those sick days.
• Television! Someone mentioned that they pull up some of the classic cartoons from when we were kids. Which, GENIUS.
• Throw out the rules. No limits on TV watching, snacking on the couch is A-OK, and if a kid wants to eat nothing but crackers all day? So be it.

I’m 100% on board with all of those things, but I have one more that I do. Every year Alexis gets entirely too many things for her birthday. Instead of allowing all of those things to go immediately into the toy rotation (where they will get played with for 10 minutes and then ignored), I snag a bunch of them and put them way up on the top shelf of our pantry. Then, when Alexis is sick and needs something to keep her busy, I pull one or two of the toys down. I try to make sure there is a stash of artsy crafty things included in with those toys because something as simple as decorating a teddy bear can keep her happy and mostly still for hours on end.

Seriously. Hours. The kid spent hours decorating that teddy bear the last time she was sick. A couple of Mucinex tamed her symptoms and the bear kept her chillaxed and distracted.

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I’m working with Mucinex and BlogHer on a series of posts about minimizing the miserable when Alexis is sick. Next up, I’m going to tell you about our favorite WOAH IS ME I’M SICK food. But first, what about you? Do you have any go-to menu items that you pull out for sick days? Leave a comment telling what activity makes your child smile when they are under the weather you’ll be entered to win a $100 CVS gift card.

The rules!

No duplicate comments.

You may receive 1 total entry by leaving a comment in response to the sweepstakes prompt on this post.

This giveaway is open to US Residents age 18 or older. Winners will be selected via random draw, and will be notified by e-mail. You have 72 hours to get back to me, otherwise a new winner will be selected.

The Official Rules are available here.

This sweepstakes runs from 2/6/2013 – 3/31/2013

Be sure to visit the Children's Mucinex Multi-Symptom Cold page on BlogHer.com where you can read other bloggers’ reviews and find more chances to win!

Eggs In A Tater

As a matter of fact, no, you shouldn't trust me with a baked potato.

I might just decide to cook something inside of it.

Oh, yes. I did.

So it turns out that if you take a baked potato, carve out the insides, and then shove some egg, cheese, and sausage (or, in my case, fake sausage) inside, you can throw it back in the oven and make magic. Delicious magic.

You'll just have to try it and see.

1 Baked potato
1 egg
1 cooked sausage link, cut into small pieces
Shredded cheddar cheese
Salt and pepper to taste

1. Preheat your oven to 375 degrees.

2. Carve out the baked potato. The more potato you remove, the more room you have for eggs and stuff.

3. Fill the baked potato with egg, sausage, salt, pepper, and top with a little cheese.

4. Bake for approximately 20 minutes, or until you stab at the egg and nothing jiggles.

5. Serve with salsa, sour cream, hot sauce, or whatever makes you happy.