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Wednesday
Aug212019

Eighth Graders and Kindergarteners OMG

I don't know which of these things is worse.

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In one corner, we have the infant headed off to kindergarten.

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And then there's THAT nonsense.

HOW? WHAT? THESE THINGS CANNOT BE.

They are, though.

Both girls headed off to school today. Both were really excited to get on their bus and head off into the big world without a parent. They were so excited, in fact, that they were ready to go a full half hour before necessary. For Mila in particular, that is nothing short of a miracle. I expect this "so excited she wakes up" thing to last about a week. She will return to having to be drug out of bed in no time, right?

Definitely.

Alexis' first day of kindergarten (YEARS ago, OMG) was wrought with stress. Her bus didn't show up, causing SO much anxiety, and then Alexis stayed true to brand and was terrified of being somewhere without me. Eventually she learned to deal, but the first day was ROUGH.

Mila, true to brand, was all like, "I'm leaving. Get out of my way." She climbed aboard that bus as if she was a seasoned Middle schooler and didn't really think there was anything worth stressing about. She stayed cool and confident all day, right up until it was time to get off the bus.

Mila's best friend lives in our neighborhood. She's further down the hill than us, but it's not THAT far. That means the girls ride the bus together, but Mila gets off one stop before her friend.

OR DOES SHE.

Mila absolutely positively refused to get off of the bus after school today. She wanted to hang out with her best friend and that was it. No discussion necessary because she had decided. Alexis had to actually get on the bus and drag Mila out kicking and screaming, which ranks real high up there when you're trying to figure out what memories you'll carry with you forever. That might just turn out to be one of those memories that we tell a future spouse, just so we know s/he has some concept of what s/he has agreed to.

Mila does what Mila wants to do.

And she will destroy everything to make sure it happens.

Tuesday
Aug202019

It's the End

Alexis should know better than to let me be around her friends, but she doesn't, so SORRY. I didn't mean to ruin your day, kids. It's just ... I SPEAK FACTS.

Let me back up a second. We are officially kissing the edge of back-to-school, which means I'm in a hurry to do all of the summer things. One of those things was one last trip to Kennywood. I can't just take my own kids, apparently, so I had a little crew wandering around the park and occasionally hanging out with me and Mila.

There's a thing about Alexis' friends, by the way ... THEY ADORE MILA. Every last one of them. They are all perfectly willing to walk past some big roller coasters for an hour or two so they can ride things with Mila. Every time. They go on The Whip and The Kangaroo, and even the Lil Phantom because they are amazing people who enjoy seeing a tiny person living her best life. Somewhere in the Mila Hour, I was in line with them all and we ended up talking about how very excited Mila is to be starting kindergarten.

Seriously, the kid is going to bust with joy before she gets on that bus for the first time. She can't stand the thought of how great kindergarten is going to be. MUCH. EXCITE.

When Mila was done gushing about how excited she is, one of Alexis' friends asked if I'm excited as well. Which, well, NO. I am not excited. I'm glad to be done with paying for full-time childcare year round, but I'm also a little sad because once kids start kindergarten, so much freedom is gone. I can't randomly take any day off I want and hang out with Mila. She has obligations and stuff now. And, for the next 13 years, she has somewhere she needs to be daily 9 months of the year.

It's the end of the complete freedom phase of childhood, if that makes sense.

I explained as much to Alexis and her friends and basically you would have thought I kicked a puppy while biting the head off of a kitten because GOODNESS. They were crushed with sadness.

"I never thought of it that way!"

"We haven't been free since we were four!"

"Starting school is THE WORST!"

"Man, it's all down hill once you start kindergarten."

They went on and on, fully realizing that their lives suck because they aren't as free to do what they want when they want as they were just 8 years ago.

Welcome to the big world, kids. It's rough out here.

(Sorry! Let's do a random Kennywood day again soon! I promise to stick to rainbows and unicorns next time!)

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Monday
Aug192019

We Really Need to Elsa It

It's amazing the things that kids absolutely refuse to forget. Alexis brings up old news all of the time, but Mila. MILA.

Mila holds grudges like WOAH.

Months ago ... before Christmas ... I bought Mila an LOL Surprise Doll. As often happens, the new toy became her most favorite thing in the world and she insisted on taking it with her EVERYWHERE. It's a frequent war we fight - I tell her to leave things in the car and she decides she's willing to die on that hill. Eventually I give in (because seriously, she is willing to die on that hill), but I do it with a, "Don't complain to me if you lose it!"

Guess what happened.

In the mall.

The little purse that the LOL Doll belonged in apparently wasn't intended to actually hold the doll inside, because it fell out and nobody noticed. Mila and I hadn't gone very far, but we weren't successful in finding her. We retraced our steps, checked the lost and found, and genuinely gave it our best effort.

I knew then exactly what happened. We really hadn't gone far, so it was clear that someone had picked it up. Those dumb things are expensive considering how little plastic is involved, so I wasn't surprised. I'm not a total idiot, though, so I didn't tell Mila that someone else had probably picked it up and kept it. That wasn't a fight that was worth fighting.

Fast forward to this week. We have listened to Mila complain about her missing doll about 2351730498120 times. Every time we set foot in that mall, she starts looking for it all over again and basically the whole thing is dumb. I want to tell Mila to "Elsa that nonsense" but I suspect she won't get that I so very badly want her to let it go.

But, for real, this was the 2351730498120th time she had whined about the missing LOL doll, and I was SO VERY OVER IT. I decided to bring on the Toy Story theme and ask Mila if she thought the doll was a lost toy.

I KNOW. IT WAS A DUMB THING TO SAY. I DON'T NEED YOU TO TELL ME.

One thing led to another and suddenly Mila realized that the doll wasn't a lost toy, but rather that someone had taken it. "She already had a home with meeeee!" Mila wailed. "I'm very mad at the girl who took my doll!" she continued. "It's not nice to a lost toy home when it's not yours!"

The kid served up a heaping side of bitter with every word she said. She. Was. Pissed.

And then Alexis made it worse. Alexis just had to bring on more Disney magic and throw out that maybe we could buy another one on eBay and ZOMG MILA WON'T STOP. She spent basically the rest of the day asking everyone to check eBay for her lost toy and if you see me go all sorts of Wreck It Ralph in public in the next few days, that's why.

I can't even with the LOL doll anymore.

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