An Expert Nagger in the Making

It's really a shame that there's no good way to take video of all of the things that happen in the back of my car when I'm driving. If only there were a safe way to get it, there would be hours and hours of videos worth saving.

First of all, the back of the car is where all of Mila's singing happens. She randomly starts singing along with all sorts of songs. We almost always have pop music playing, so lately she's been singing along to Drake, Justin Timberlake, Meghan Trainor, and Adele. It is THE BEST.

But then there's Silento. Somehow Mila has decided that Watch Me is the greatest song ever recorded. If she asks for "susic," that's what she's asking for. She wants to listen to Silento whip and nae over and over and over again. Literally. The second it's over, she asks me to play it again. All. Day. Long. And THAT is why kids are cute, friends. It's so you don't throw them out the window for asking for a song for the 7 billionth time.

When there's not singing going on, there's a whole lot of back seat driving going on. As of late, Mila has been telling me which way to go. "Dat way!" she declares if I'm anywhere near the playground. She can guide me to two playgrounds, she can get to our house, and she's really very good at yelling at me for not going past McDonald's on my way to drop her off at daycare.

Today she figured out ice cream. I don't know what made her realize that the place where we often get ice cream is to the left of daycare; I've never connected the two places. We go from daycare to grab Alexis and THEN we might go get ice cream, but never the other way around. But somehow, some way, Mila realized that I should be going left when I was going right and HOOBOY.

Let's just say I fear for Mila's future partner in life, should she decide to have one. She's going to have so many years of experience perfecting her back seat driving skills. She's going to be a force.




The Big Kid has never been much of a tattletale. She may report what other kids do, but she does it out of a place of confusion. Her giant grandma heart literally doesn't understand how it's possible that some people can knowingly break rules without having a nervous breakdown.

If she tells me about something that happened, she's not trying to get anyone in trouble. She's trying to understand.

I didn't realize it until the shenanigans were over, but I think that's why I heard Mila's tale of woe earlier today. I apparently have not yet developed that thing many moms have where they automatically tune out tattling.

It might be time to learn how to do that.

The whole thing started very early this morning. Mila somehow discovered the stash of hidden pacifiers. They've been stowed in a vase for so long that I had forgotten they were still in the house. Mila was overjoyed, to put it lightly. She quickly grabbed a dusty pacifier, stuck it in her face, and then covered it with the palm of her hand so I wouldn't notice that there was a giant yellow thing sitting there.

She was pretty pleased with herself for a moment there, but then she apparently started to worry that her hand wasn't enough to block me from stealing the pacifier from her. Her nervousness drove her to trying to hide it. With her eyes firmly on me, Mila quickly shoved the pacifier into the nearest backpack. The backpack happened to be Alexis' dance bag.

I told Alexis to let it be. The pacifier wasn't hurting anything sitting in the backpack and I figured I would steal it back later.

Of course, I forgot to steal it. Hours went by and the girls wound up in the back seat of the car. Dance class had ended, so the backpack sat between the girls.

Mila remembered that she had a prize hiding in it.

She asked for the backpack nicely at first, but Alexis had forgotten why her sister would want access to something so important. The girls don't often fight, but in that moment they almost did. Alexis told Mila to get lost, Mila asked for the bag again and again, and I just sat quietly in the front as I waited for traffic to clear.

Mila grew frustrated. She started to fuss, so I reminded her to use her words.

The good news is that Mila is pretty good about using her words. If you remind her that fussing doesn't fix anything, she usually will find a word or two that helps. This time she found a bunch of words.

"Aless-sis, dat's not nice. Give it back!" she said. Then, "Mom, Aless-sis mean!"

She added some more words for effect, but the gist of it was, "That kid over there stole something of mine and she won't give it back. FIX IT WAAAAAAAH."

And with that, Mila unlocked the Tattling On Her Sibling achievement.

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This Two Kids Thing Has Some Challenges. Whodathunkit?

You can't hang out at the beach AND go to gymnastics classes, so both girls had to miss a week of the fun. For Alexis, that was fine because she has somehow found herself to be the only one who regularly shows up for her tumbling class. Private lessons at group class prices, FTW! A few weeks of one-on-one time has done wonders for helping her get more confident with some of her nuttier tumbling runs, so she was completely okay with missing a week.

The other one, though. HOOBOY.

Mila's love for gymnastics has escalated as each weeks passes. She gets braver and braver, which means she has more and more fun. She's now routinely throwing herself off the edge of a trampoline into a pit of foam squares six to eight feet below. Zero hesitation. She just jumps off and assumes all will be well. The good news is that if she tries to do that somewhere that isn't gymnastics, at least I know she will giggle on her way down. It's going to hurt when she lands, but laughter along the way will help.

Mila didn't realize she was missing a week of gymnastics, but she sure did cherish the moment when we returned.

The second I turned the corner towards the gym, Mila yelled, "GYMNASTICS!" Which, yes, that's a disappointment right there. She used to say "Nassy-sticks" but apparently when you try to video a kid saying a word in a funny way too many times, they figure out how to say the word correctly. It made for a depressing day, that's for sure. With her properly enunciated declaration out of the way, Mila threw in some excited kicks and bounces and WOWSERS. I now know what it looks like when glee shoots out of that kid's butt.

She had a very fun 45 minutes. I've figured out that if I offer her donuts at the end of class, I can get her to leave willingly, so it's pretty darn perfect.

And this week is the last week of classes. ::SadTrombone::

I haven't signed anybody up for tumbling or gymnastics or anything because HELLO, CHEER SEASON. Cheer season sucks up every minute of every day, it seems. It leads straight into dance season which is a whole other kind of time suck, so basically if Alexis wants to do anything that isn't dancing, cheering, eating, or sleeping, she's going to have to wait until November. It's not a negotiable thing because she will soon have some sort of practice four nights per week and a game on the weekend.

That's it. That's my max.

Which leaves Mila with nothing. Which is clearly a problem.

So, hey, if you see me running around like a chicken who is having a very bad day, just know it's because I am running all over town so that both of the girls can do the things they want to do. Somehow I'm going to figure out how to balance all of the things.

And I wouldn't want it to be any other way.