Blue and Angry

Things That Make Me Go SQUEEEE!

The thing about being unemployed for a while is that it means you don't get to buy a car. No matter what. So when I wrecked my car way back in January, much suffering had to be done.

And by "suffering" I mean I had to drive my husband's car for MONTHS (while he drove our old pickup truck).

And by "had to drive my husband's car" I mean "had to drive a car I *HATE*HATE*HATE*.

It's not a bad car. It has its place in life, and that place is to be driven from point A to point B and don't you dare stop at the Starbucks drive-thru along the way because OMG IT DOESN'T HAVE POWER WINDOWS.

Shoosh. I'm only sort of a princess. Case in point: I was totally OK with the lack of power locks. The lack of seat warmers was a bit of a challenge, but the power locks? Only a problem twice. When I locked the keys in the car. Did you know that you have to actually take the keys with you if you're going to manually lock doors? I do now!

We won't talk about all of the times I left the lights on and ended up with a dead battery. It seems that his car doesn't consistently do that DING! DING! thing when you leave the lights on.

So when I finally got a new car (SQUEEEEE!) this past weekend, it was with much SQUEEEEE! that I discovered how much I had missed the simple things in life.

You guys, automatic transmissions are the bomb-diggity. No more panicking that I was going to roll backwards into another car when stopped on a hill! SQUEEEE!

The weather was pretty fantastic on Saturday when we bought it (the actual purchase is a whole other story, now that I think about it), and even more so on Sunday when I first drove it. That meant I had to open up the sunroof and SQUEEEE! SUNROOF! If I could have figured out how to drive with my head sticking out of the roof, I would have done it. As it was, I settled for sticking my hand through the hole in the roof and it was glorious.

And then it turned cold outside and SEAT WARMERS SQUEEEEE! My buns like to be toasty and warm when I sit on them.

But the ultimate moment came when I stopped for a caramel macchiato on Monday. As I pulled into the Starbucks drive thru, I reached down and prepared to turn the window crank. But! But! There is no window crank! There is a button! And it automagically makes the windows go up and down! And SQUEEEEE!

There's nothing that screams AMERICA! more than sitting in the drive thru at Starbucks pushing a button that automagically makes your windows go up and down.

Especially when you're sitting in a Japanese car. AMERICA!

The Things We Do For Kids

I seem to have wriggled myself into a bit of a conundrum. Before I tell you about that conundrum, however, you are heretoforth sworn to secrecy about what I'm about to tell you. I swear I will hunt you down and make you pay if you so much as hint to Alexis what I'm about to write.

Hold on. Sometimes she snoops around these parts.

I have Bieber tickets.

SHHHHHH! SHHHHHOOOOOOOOSHHHHH! NOT. A. WORD.

Alexis has absolutely no idea that I bought tickets to see Justin Bieber in concert next Tuesday. I don't plan on telling her until we start walking to the concert. I'm not even kidding when I say I will cut anyone who ruins the surprise.

Including myself.

Which is how I ended up in a conundrum.

When the tickets first went on sale many, many months ago, I had a pretty fantastic opportunity to get four tickets at face value. So I did. The plan was that I would invite a few of Alexis' friends. It was going to be the ultimate in motherly sacrifices, one which I would remind her of every holiday. "What's that Alexis? What do I want for Mother's Day? Remember that time I sacrificed my sanity and took you and your friends to see Justin Bieber? I think you owe me for every scream I had to endure."

The thing is that I didn't immediately try to figure out which friends to invite because Alexis was still in kindergarten at the school we didn't love. I didn't want to invite friends who she wouldn't still be friends with by the time the concert rolled around nearly a year later.

No problem! I could just wait until fall and her new school!

Except that each and every time I've made a little headway on figuring out who would be good to invite, I've had to slam on the brakes.

That kid who doesn't sleep is really very smart.

Asking her too many pointed questions was bound to land me in the Land of BUSTED. About two weeks ago, I realized it wasn't going to work. There just isn't a way to find out who the Bieber fans are in her class and who I can handle for a night. She will catch on. The surprise is more important to me than who she goes to the concert with, so I started looking to sell the tickets.

But then I mentioned something about the whole thing to twitter, and twitter had a FANTASTIC idea. If I'm going to sell the tickets, why not do it so that Christmas Crazy benefits? Right? Right!

So the tickets are for sale on ebay. If you're interested in bidding, here is the listing. It ends tomorrow because HOLY COW THE CONCERT IS NEXT WEEK AND THAT MEANS THANKSGIVING IS, TOO. CRAP.

(Who had the bright idea to let Thanksgiving move up in the month? It's completely screwing up my brain that it is NEXT WEEK.)

All proceeds from the sale of the tickets will get thrown in the Christmas Crazy bucket. I don't know exactly how protecting a secret wound up benefiting kids in need, but here we are.

SHHHHHHH!