Not Sure Which One is More Bull-Headed

Since you are here, and you are THE BESTEST, wanna take a second to click over and vote? I will only ask 18 more times. Promise!

This is Only a Test

If this were an actual test of your sanity, this procedure would be conducted by a trained professional and NOT a three-year old. It might also come with some sort of medication.

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"What's that?" she asks.

"A mosquito," he replies.

"Why is it a mosquito?" she asks.

"Because it's a mosquito," he adds.

"But WHY is it a mosquito?" she continues. For ten minutes.

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"Alexis, stop trying to put a barrette in Meg's fur," I scold.

"I just making her pretty," she replies.

"Stop. it. now." I say.

"But I just make her pretty!" the child counters.

"If you start another sentence with 'I just' you're going to time out," I say. This is a common threat that I'm not afraid to follow-up on because "I just" makes me sporky.

"She likes it!" she replies, simultaneously continuing to argue and yet actually following directions.

"Leave Meg alone, NOOOOW!" I yell.

"She wants me to make her pretty," she replies, right before she begins the trek to time out.

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"Eat your dinner," I tell her.

"I'm not hungry," she says.

"Take a bite of your pizza roll, Alexis," I reply.

"But I'm not hungry!" she says. She continues, "Can I have a popsicle?"

"Absolutely not. Eat your dinner," I say as my eyes roll out of my head.

"But I want a popsicle!" she counters.

"Eat your dinner and you can have a popsicle," I say.

"But I'm not hungry!" she proclaims.

"Alexis," I glare, "Are you hungry enough to eat a popsicle?"

"Yes," she replies, eyes open wide.

"Then you're hungry enough to eat your pizza roll," I say.

"BUT I'M NOT HUNGRY!" she screams.

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"Mommy, I want some water," she says.

"Where is your water?" I ask.

"In the fridge," she says.

"Then go get it," I offer up the simple solution, which also might be the lazy one.

She walks to the fridge, opens it, and finds that her water is not where she expected. She returns to the living room and begins her chant. "My water wasn't there. My water wasn't there. My water wasn't there. My water wasn't there. My water wasn't there. My water wasn't there. My water wasn't there. My water wasn't there. My water wasn't there. My water wasn't there."

If you think I'm exaggerating about how many times she repeated that statement, you obviously have never met a 3-year old.

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I'd ask when the sanity test will end, but I already know the answer--Ten minutes after my head explodes. In other words, WAY too late.

Underpants Because It's a Miracle We Still Have Power

I have my limits.

Despite the fact that I post a photo pretty much every day, there are soooooo many that never make it to a public space because I deem them inappropriate for sharing online. Generally I draw the line by deciding if I think a particular photo will eventually be GOLD when it comes to blackmailing Alexis into doing something. The one of her nekkid and sweeping the deck? That one is going to win me some leverage when Alexis brings home a loser and I want him or her kicked to the curb. The one of her nekkid sprawled on the couch? Will likely ensure that Mr. Husband and I wind up in a good nursing home. That one bath photo? That one is like money in the bank. Only better.

I mention this because as I was going through my photos from yesterday, I found a fun little gem. It was taken right before this one:

There is a reason those two are laughing. It started with a little , "I see London, I see France," and it ended with Alexis pulling her dress up over her head and yelling, "I SEE ALEXIS' UNDERPANTS."

The blackmail power of that photo is dependent on Alexis outgrowing her amusement with flashing her Elmo underwear. If she doesn't? I have photographic evidence that HER FATHER is to blame. Never laugh at the flashing, yo.

Ahem.

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Playroom decision? Made. Thank you all SOOO MUCH. I highly recommend asking the Internet for advice because it does help. Sometimes. Oh, and you have to wait to find out the result until we move next month. Try not to lose sleep over it.

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As I write this, Pittsburgh is getting hammered with severe storms. There are reports of flooding all over town (although, my little neighborhood is pretty dry--WTH?). Send life vests and happy thoughts, because holy hell are a lot of people dealing with major damage to their homes.

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Got a second? Clicky, clicky, please? I promise to only ask about nineteen more times. KTHXBAI!