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Christmas Crazy Volume 1 1/2

Christmas Crazy

'Twas the week before Christmas when all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse

The stockings were hung above the fireplace with care

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there

The Toddler was nestled all snug in her bed

While visions of Pens hockey danced in her head

Daddy was asleep, while I was on the roam

Working to make sure enough trees donned our home

Sure it's little, but it still does matter

A tiny Boyd's tree makes hearts pitter patter

Off to the loo for a quick little bash

Another little tree with no lights to cause a rash

Onto the hall for another tree aglow

This one donned with Body's Bears and a big bow

Next on to the fireplace topped with a mirror

Where one Winnie the Pooh tree did appear

With a leap and a skip next I moved quick

To the Toddler's own tree, adorned with ornament she did pick

Yet another tree comes next in our fun little game

It's full of motion and has a Snow White, she's a dame

At last we move to the final tree, the biggie

Everything must match or I get wiggie

Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer! now, Vixen!

Come, Comet! come, Cupid! come, Donner, come, Blitzen!

This is the spot, the place for it all

Here's where to put all that stuff from the mall

Now Santa we know you are a great guy

Saying you don't wrap would totally be a lie

So make sure you wrap those gifts whatever you do

It's OK if you don't use red, white, and silver wrap, too

Using "special" paper would not be a goof

Just make sure it's not Dora or I'll go through the roof

Dear Santa please make sure that there in that sack

are Penguins tickets cause without the Toddler will crack

Thank you dear Santa for knowing how it goes

The Toddler will love her gifts with all those shiny bows

I'm sure we will hear as you fade from sight

Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

It's your turn! Show the world your Christmas Crazy, be it photos, a story, or something you found online. I'll be back with more, sharing our outdoor lights late on December 20th.

Rules of participation: Link to your post about Christmas Crazy. Please link the url of the page that the post is on and NOT just your blog. That way people can find the post without searching and we can all share in the fun. Post the Christmas Crazy button at the top so we all know we are at the right post and link back here so your readers can come and see all the other crazy. Cause Christmas is all about sharing. And finding fun in the crazy. Or whatever she said.


Just When You Think You Know a Kid

Guess what Alexis did today.

Go ahead, guess.

Sat on Santa's lap.

Uh huh. On her own free will.

I didn't see it, but I did see photographic evidence.

Apparently, if Santa visits your class at daycare and gets down on the floor and plays with Barbies, THEN it is OK for you to circle him like a shark, inching closer and closer with every lap, right up until you're standing next to him. Then, if your teacher introduces you to Santa, he is totally allowed to say, "Want to sit on my lap?"

Just do it. Sit on Santa's lap. Then tell Santa that you want a Penguins Game and Sidney Crosby for Christmas.

BTW, if you hear reports of some crazy ol' dude with a white beard stalking Sidney to the point of a restraining order, it totally wasn't me. It was SANTA, and he's just trying to make a little girl's dreams come true.

Reminder: The Christmas Crazy party is starting soon! I'll be putting up Mr. Linky tomorrow night so that y'all can start linking up your photos, stories, and links about the Christmas crazy you found in your life. Thanks!

Since Santa wraps, I better start working on a box big enough to hold a hockey player . . .


The Toddler and The Big Guy, Round 3

The nagging started weeks ago. "Momma, I want to go see Santa," the Toddler would say. Over and over. And over and over. There were a few false starts in the quest to appease She Who Had Things to Tell The Big Guy, but tonight was the night. Tonight I picked the kid up from school with full intentions of taking her to see Jolly Old Saint Nick.

"What are you going to tell Santa you want for Christmas?" I asked the Toddler.

"Penguin game!" she would say.

"Are you going to sit in Santa's lap?" I asked.

"Yeah!" she would enthusiastically reply.

I was positive she was lying. Not about the Penguins game part, that I believed. I didn't believe her that she was actually going to tell it to Santa. If history is an indicator, she was sure to be all about Santa, right up until the moment she was close enough to smell the booze on his breath and kid pee on his pants. So, I figured the perimeter to be about ten feet or so.

When we first walked into the mall, the line to chill with Santa was a long one, so we wandered upstairs to visit the Mouse for a bit. As Alexis ran all over Mickey's store telling me she wanted the Daisy t-shirt, the Minnie dress (btw, BOO-YAH! It's already under the tree!), the Cinderella figurines, the Minnie pajamas, and the four-foot tall stuffed Minnie, I kept telling her, "Well, I guess you'll have to tell Santa you want that, too!"

She agreed. "Yeah, I tell Santa!"

We finally emerged from The Disney Store empty-handed and found the line for Santa had gone down significantly. I repeated my, "Are you sure you want to go see Santa and sit on his lap?" interrogation and was met with the smiling face of an excited little girl as she grabbed my hand and drug me towards The Big Guy.

We got in line and spent ten minutes listening to an elf's spiel about photos. I'm not sure why I should select a portrait package when portraits don't yet exist, but I had no problem just rambling, "Two 5x7's, please." I knew it wasn't going to happen.

As we moved closer and closer to Santa, Alexis continued to express her enthusiasm. "I see Santa!" "Look! It's almost my turn!" "I'm going to tell Santa I want Penguins!" and on and on.

I started to believe.

And yet, I didn't.

We moved closer and closer, and suddenly we were next. I looked down at Alexis and asked, "Are you ready to go see Santa?"

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" she replied as she crumpled into a little pile of frightened Toddler goo.

That's all right, kiddo. You just keep on being scared of strange old guys in red suits who promise you toys and claim to not want anything in return.