Wednesday
Aug182010

Whichever.

This is the post where I should be telling you about all the fun that Alexis had at Kennywood. I should be showing you cryptic photos that may or may not show the kid having fun:

 

Did she like the giant pirate ship. Maybe? It's hard to tell.

I should also be telling you how crazy it is that they installed new swings in Kiddieland. Really small swings, at that. They had these ones in 2007:

But now the new ones are a LOT smaller:

(You can try to tell me that they just painted the old one, but clearly the photographs show that the ride has shrunk. Ahem.)

But I'm not telling you all about Kennywood because all I can think about is The Toad. The Toad that tried to murder me tonight.

I was minding my own business, just doing a little yard work. I lifted up something in the yard, and there it was. A GIANT toad, easily the size of my head (Or my fist. Whichever.). It stared at me with its dark, evil, soul-sucking eyes for a moment, not even considering that it should maybe MOVE OUT OF MY WAY. I needed to stick my hands exactly where it was, but The Toad was willing to wage war.

So, I went over to another part of the yard to do some work. What can I say? I'm a chicken.

Twenty minutes later, I surveyed my original crime scene. Finding no evidence of The Toad, I went back to work. I was happily minding my own business, finally making a little progress when it happened.

The Toad tried to murder me.

It appeared out of nowhere and lunged towards my face (Or my foot. Whichever.), narrowly missing a chance to sink its scary fangs (Do toads have teeth? They must.) into my skin (Or my shoe. Whichever.). I demanded that The Toad move away from me (Or screamed like a girl. Whichever.), but it just sat there. Challenging me.

I grabbed my shovel and began smashing The Toad (Or gently nudging it. Whichever.), but it was far too strong. It grabbed my shovel out of my hands and hurled it at me (Not really.).

I abandoned the battlegrounds, but I will return. The Toad may have won that battle, but once I assemble an army, I shall win the war.

Right after I figure out how the heck Kennywood shrunk those swings so much.

Tuesday
Aug172010

Pyshic Children Make Me Nervous

I AM A WINNER!

No, really.

I wrote this post last week, seriously upset that I had been promising Alexis a trip to Kennywood for months, but had yet to make good on it. I happened to mention the whole thing to Mr. Husband during a phone call, to which he responded, "Isn't this weekend our last chance for a while?"

He was right. Our weekends are booked solid for the next several weeks.

So we made the executive decision to ignore all the things we needed to do this past Saturday and instead surprise Alexis with a day at the amusement park. We never mentioned it to her. In fact, we never even discussed it when in the same zip code as her.

And, yet, she knew.

She woke up Saturday morning bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, all ready to go. When pressed, she would ask if we were going to Kennywood.

HOW DO THEY DO THAT?

I can't figure out where I left my car keys, but she can figure out where we're going without us even mentioning it?

I think she has the phones tapped. There is no other explanation.

Tuesday
Aug172010

At the Top of the To Do List

Summer is almost over. I can't even begin to wrap my brain around that fact, which is good because thinking about it makes me a little sad.

For the first 3 years of her life, Alexis had it good. We routinely visited some of Pittsburgh's best places to be . . . places like the Children's Museum, the Zoo, Phipps Conservatory, the Carnegie Museums, etc. But then we bought a new house, a beat-up foreclosure to be exact, and it all came to a crashing halt. Gone were the free weekends. They had been filled with long lists of things that needed to be done, and wallets had to be closed as we sought to pay for those projects.

To continue reading and for a chance at a $100 Visa Gift Card, hop on over here.