Friday, March 4, 2011Ariel Needs To Go Hang Out With The Latina Whore
I threw open the playroom door like a woman on a mission. Which I was. I scanned the room and spotted it--the Ariel costume. Alexis has been wearing the darn thing so much lately that she hasn't managed to put it back in the closet for even a second.
It was time for me to make the costume "go swimming with the fishes."
Not permanently, mind you. Just for the next few weeks . . . long enough to be sure that it won't make the trip to Florida with us later this month.
We're headed back to Orlando again, with a few days at Disney World certainly high on the agenda. The appointment is scheduled for Bibbiddi Bobbiddi Boutique, of course. Once you've let your kid get princessified, there's no going back. I always make her pick a costume from her stash to take with us. The ones sold in the parks are equal to the quality of those sold at The Disney Store, but at double the price. Actually, considering I buy her costumes/dress-up clothes at The Disney Store during Halloween clearance season, the cost difference is probably close to the equivalent of 25 trips to Starbucks.
She has plenty to pick from . . . Cinderella and Snow White, Tinkerbell and Alice, Jasmine and Aurora, they're all hanging in that closet. And, yet, this year she swears she wants to wear Ariel.
Which, UGH.
The husband and I agree. The costume is fine for playing dress-up, and it's probably one of the better Ariel costumes out there. However, it's still hideous and ill-fitting and generally nowhere near as cute as her other choices. In fact, out of her entire closet of dress-up clothes, it's the only costume I genuinely don't like.
Since we are in agreement that the costume needs to stay home when the kid gets princessified, I figured the best way to handle the situation was to make it disappear. Now. It's like pulling off the Band-Aid. If you wait until the last second, the pain is fresh. I'd rather have time for the pain to dull.
The kid will never know I'm behind the disappearance. She is horrible about hanging her costumes back up, so if one disappears, she just won't know where she left it. She remembers where she left the silver high-heel Barbie shoe, but she doesn't remember where she throws clothes when she takes them off.
She won't know, the disappearance is for the greater good, and there is a united parental front behind the scheme, but yet I chickened out. I CHICKENED OUT.
I stood over that horrible costume, my face twisted in an evil genius grimace, and then stormed right back out of the playroom empty-handed.
I need to grow a pair. STAT.
Green Eggs and Ham and Potato and Spinach Frittatas are TOTALLY the Same Thing
Number 15062 on the Great List of Things People Don't Mention When You're About to have a Kid is that whole thing where you will not only know about all sorts of random holidays, but you'll find yourself celebrating them. Alexis started pestering me a week ago about Dr. Seuss' birthday, so there was no way I was going to dodge celebrating the day. She specifically requested green eggs and ham for dinner as part of her party-palooza. Of course, I couldn't just make boring old green eggs and ham, so I made a frittata and gave it a green twist.
The frittata recipe is roughly based on what my host mother made when I spent my senior year of high school in Spain. I'm not any good at following instructions letter-for-letter, so I haven't looked at the recipe she wrote out for me in . . . um . . . almost two decades. (GET OFF MY LAWN, WHIPPERSNAPPERS.) This is probably pretty close, though.
Potato and Spinach Frittata
1-2 tablespoons olive oil
4 potatoes, peeled and cubed
1 onion, chopped
1/4 cup cooked chopped spinach (frozen or fresh)
8 eggs
1/4 cup milk
Salt and paper to taste
Cheese (mozzarella or provolone are my favorites)
Heat olive oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium high heat. Add in the potatoes and cook, stirring occasional.
When the potatoes begin to soften, toss in the onion and spinach. Cook until the potatoes are tender and the onion is clear.
In a medium bowl, whisk the eggs and milk together. Add salt and pepper, if desired. Slowly pour the egg mixture over the potatoes. (Green = Happy Dr. Seuss Day!)
Green food coloring in the egg mixture is TOTALLY optional. But interesting.Use a heat resistant spatula to gently push the edges of the frittata inward, so that the sides are rounded. (Raw egg will seep around the edges as you go--that's OK. Keep working around the entire edge until the egg cooks enough to create a rounded "wall.")
I Swear There is a Black Spatula in that Photo. Somewhere.
Continue to cook the frittata until the sides are firm and it's nearly cooked all the way through.
It's Only Shiny in the Middle!
Now for the magical part. Turn off the heat and place a plate on top of the frittata. Like this:
Flip the skillet and plate so that the frittata is resting uncooked side down on the plate.
The Green Makes It Look Almost Burnt. It Wasn't.
Then slide the frittata back into the skillet and turn the heat back on.
Sprinkle cheese over the top of the frittata (cheese slices are also OK--just cover the top).
Cook until the cheese is melted and all of the egg is done. Cut into slices and TAH-DAH!
We usually marry the frittata with some good bread along with a few slices of Morningstar Farms Bac'n.
If you want to do it Spain Style, use ham and a good bread with a tough crust.
Psst . . . Speaking of things that are an odd shade of green, I'm giving away a Family Four Pack of Shrek the Musical tickets over here.
