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Proof that I Can Be Trained

Alexis rarely gets sick. Sure, she leaks bodily fluids from every orifice imaginable pretty much all the time, but that's so totally a daycare toddler thing. I don't think the kids are happy if they can't smear snot all over each other. It's like a symbol of love and devotion with them.

When Alexis does have a cold, as she has for the past week, I tend to be all "whatever" about it. I'm not one to rush her to the doctor each time she sneezes, and since Mr. Husband and I have had the same cold right there with her (gee, I wonder if that has anything to do with all the snot smearing?), we knew she was pretty much OK. A little coughing and congestion never really hurt anybody, especially since nobody ever had a fever.

And yet, all it took were the words, "My ear hurts" and I jumped out of my desk and teleported my way to daycare to pick the kid up early today. Seriously, RECORD TIME. Along the way, I called our pediatrician.

Me: "My two-year old says her ear hurts."
Lady Whose Job it is to Keep You Away: "Does she have any other symptoms?"
Me: "No . . . uh, yeah. She does. She totally has a fever."
Lady Whose Job it is to Keep You Away: "Have you given her anything?"
Me: "Ma'am, please just let me bring her in. PLEASE."
Lady Whose Job it is to Keep You Away: "?????"

I really do appreciate the triage nurse thing that our pediatrician does--it saves time and money for all involved. However, Little Miss Alexis has history. A history of getting sick beyond the point of being all "whatever" the VERY SECOND it is a holiday or we are out of town.

Knock, knock. Who's there? CHRISTMAS EVE. It's the double-whammy of a holiday AND us getting ready to head out of town.

I ain't screwing around with any ear pain, yo. It has taken way more really bad holidays/trips than it should have for me to learn my lesson, but -oh- has it been learned.

So, I made up symptoms and generally lied my way into the pediatrician's office. Sure, daycare had only called me because they didn't want to forget to tell me Alexis said her ear hurt. Sure, she only said it once. Sure, she was behaving totally normal. I didn't care. Meh behbeh was getting her ears looked at, and that was that.

Into the pediatrician's office Alexis and I went, with her acting entirely too chipper to be sick. She LOVES going to the doctor. I suppose it's because they hand out stickers and pretzels. I dunno. I just know that she was singing at the top of her lungs as the nurse took her temp and went over her symptoms.

I try not to lie in person, and the thermometer was selling me up the river anyway, so I came clean and said, "She said her ear hurt once." I, of course, got The Stare.

"Which ear?" the nurse asked. Me. Who didn't have ear pain. I don't think.

I finally came to my senses after a few moments of pondering the question and asked Alexis. You know, the kid who is totally capable of speaking for herself.

Which she did.

The nurse was not impressed. She gave me the My Time is Being Wasted at the End of the Day and I Could Already Be Heading Home Stare. She tried to disguise it with a big friendly grin, but OH I saw it.

Finally the doctor came in and after entirely too much beating around the bush, he said, "So, do you have monsters in your ear?" as he peeked into Alexis ear.

I held my breath, thinking I might have to kick the guy in the donkey omelets for suggesting anything even remotely referring to monsters. Just as I was about to inform him he had better not have caused me a month worth of sleepless nights by gabbing about monsters hiding in my kid's ears, he said, "Yup, it's infected."

I tried very hard not to do a little "I Called it Right!" Jig right then and there.

But, I totally called it right.

I think that proves you really can teach an old dog new tricks.


I consulted the random number generator thingy for yesterday's post about the dollhouse, and it picked #2. So, Woy, drop me a line and tell me what you want me to do with Mrs. Goodbee. I can send it to you, donate it to the charity of your choice, or even hold onto it for PittGirl's Home for Anonymous Bloggers Who No Longer Blog. I'm sure she could have LOADS of fun with it.

(There will be Christmas light photos tomorrow night. I promise.)


Mrs. Goodbee is Homeless

Remember Mrs. Goodbee? She's still up to her usual tricks and keeping the Toddler happy for hours on end. It's amazing how much time a kid can spend twisting and contorting little people as she plays out situations that only make sense in her head. Sometimes the situations that she creates are amusing in my head, like this one:

Ten seconds before I took that photo The Sweater Twins were gazing into each others eyes as they held hands. You gotta love the diversity going on there. And the cutesy matching sweaters. Heh.

The good folks at Learning Curve seem to have dropped an extra Mrs. Goodbee dollhouse into my lap. Obviously, we don't need two dollhouses, so I'm looking to you to figure out what to do with the extra one. Come up with a caption for the photo below and leave it in the comments. I will randomly select one comment as the "winner," and that person will get to tell me what to do with Mrs. Goodbee. You could tell me to send it to you, you could tell me to drop it off at a specific charity, or you could give me the name/address of a little girl who would really appreciate a little surprise in the mail. Deadline is December 23, 2008 at 9:00pm Pittsburgh time.

Make some magic, yo.


Kinda Sappy, but I Want to Remember it All

It's been quite some time now since Alexis made up her mind that she wanted Santa to make the appropriate arrangements for her to attend a Penguins game. Forget the toys, the clothes, the books, all she wanted for Christmas was Pens tickets. Well, Santa is magical and all, but he doesn't have the power to alter the Pens schedule, so he had to work a little of his mojo and make things happen for the kid a wee bit before Christmas. In fact, with a thud and a clank, he somehow maneuvered through Alexis' bedroom window yesterday and left a little something under her tree.

We quickly ushered the surprised little Pens freak to the floor and urged her to open her present. (And, yes, Santa did manage to use the fugliest blue Dora paper anyone has ever seen.)

To be honest, I was a little worried that giving a kid paper for Christmas (albeit ridiculously expensive paper) was going to go over about as well as a couple of neck ties do with Mr. Husband.

Yet, she seemed to know instantly what the pieces of paper represented. Maybe that's because Santa and Sidney Crosby were allegedly in her room the night before and told her she was going to a game. I'm not even kidding, that was her story all morning long. Before she knew about the tickets. Or that there was a game.

She was excited about those pieces of paper.

She was nearly as excited about the new baby blue jersey Santa snuck in as she was those tickets.

She clutched those tickets in her chubby little hands and held them tight for hours after Santa dropped by. It was next to impossible to wrestle them from her, but she was more than willing to show them to anyone who asked.

When finally it came time to leave for the game, Alexis donned her new blue jersey and insisted on pairing it with a jean skirt and the stuffed Penguin she got at a game last year. She clutched that Penguin tight all through the game.

She grinned with glee every time she spotted Sidney Crosby on the ice, who was kind enough to wear his blue jersey so he would perfectly match Alexis.

Alexis' excitement all through the game was the kind of thing you wish you could toss in a bottle, seal up tight, and set on a shelf to cherish for years to come. It was the sort of warm fuzzy night that makes parenting a kid (who today yelled for over an hour, with shrieks that were drenched in misery, because she wanted some waffles but then refused to eat them) all worth while.

Better than worth while.


There's no feeling better than the one you get when you realize you have made your kid very, very happy.

Alexis had a fun little moment with her good bud Iceburgh, who was kind enough to come stand near us for a while. Alexis waved to him, smiled at him, and blew him kisses then promptly buried her face and cried fear-filled tears when he tried to shake her hand. Iceburgh is a classy mascot, though, and gave her a little distance before blowing her a kiss goodbye and heading to another part of the arena.

The Pens lost the game in Epic Fail style.

But a little two-year old didn't care about the final score because Santa made her dream come true.