It's About Time This One Causes Some Sleep Drama

I knew she was broken the night I went to lay Mila down in her crib and she started screaming. I immediately picked her back up and she grinned. So, I layed her back down. She screamed. We did that over and over again for about five minutes because ZOMG I AM SO EASILY AMUSED AND IT WAS AHHH-MAZING.

Happy baby!

Sad baby.

Happy baby!

Sad baby.

Happy baby!

It was because she was sick and the muck in her head was collecting then draining. She was all sorts of pissed off about it, except for when she wasn't.

I figured out a little workaround for She Who Adores Sleep Muchly that night, and all was well. Mostly. Mila managed to get some sleep, but it was under all sorts of weird conditions that she would normally find unacceptable. Cuddling? NOOOOO! NOT THAT! ANYTHING BUT THAT!

What I'm saying is that I now know that if she is in a cuddly mood at bedtime, Mila probably doesn't feel well.

The next few nights were all sorts of chaotic and awful in that very special way that is unique to the thing that is having a sick baby in the house. But, fortunately, yesterday Mila found her way through the worst of the sick and seemed ready to get back to normal at bedtime.

Bedtime is 8:30, by the way. Mila decided that about a month ago. She's very insistent that she wants to be placed in her crib at 8:30 and left alone so that she can make out with the peace and quiet for a few minutes before falling asleep. And, yes, she is most definitely my child. I just happen to make out with peace and quiet while on the couch instead of in bed.

Last night we went through our routine and I left Miss Mila to her peace and quiet. She seemed happier than she had been in DAYS and I looked forward to her finally getting a good night's sleep.

But then 9:00 rolled around and she was still awake.

And 9:30.

And 10:00.

And 10:30.

I kept watching her through the video monitor. She was all sorts of happy. She was rolling around, to and fro, chattering up a storm, and playing with her feet.

Those tiny, adorable, scrunchy feet.

She found them a few weeks ago and they have been FASCINATING ever since. The only person more obsessed with Mila's feet than Mila is me, so I get it. They're awesome and adorable. Mila is enthralled by them for her own set of reasons, I'm sure, but the top reason is they're right there! Close! The second reason is that they move! See? Wiggly feet!

She just can't get enough.

And, apparently, sometimes she can't sleep because she needs to spend hours playing with them.

I'd had quite enough of Awake Baby, so I desperately sought out a solution. I tried to cuddle her to sleep, but Mila is well enough to remember that cuddling her way to sleep is a stupid idea. I also tried laying her on the guest bed and letting the ceiling fan transfix her little mind, but even that usually dependable trick failed.

So I took her feet away from her.

Yeah, I know that sleep sac is too small, but I don't much care when I've been begging a baby to go to sleep for hours. Also, I probably should have let her keep her hands, but GO TO SLEEP, CHILD. NOW.

Obviously, she was pissed. She was so pissed that in the four minutes it took me to take that photo and post it to Instagram, she went and did this.

Sound asleep.

So that is the story of how Mila was grounded from playing with her feet forever and ever and ever.

(Until tonight when I put her in a sleep sac and she lost her ever-loving mind because WOMAN, SLEEPING IS HARD WHEN RESTRAINED BY A STRAIGHT JACKET.)

Salted Caramel Apple Bars

If your neighbor is kind enough to invite your kid to go to an apple orchard for some apple picking, the correct answer is "yes." The correct answer is also "Shhhh! No complaining about how many apples end up at your house!"

It's a lot, by the way. A TON.

That means I'm making all of the apple things, including these Salted Caramel Apple Bars. I came across the recipe earlier in the summer and made note of it. Apparently I knew that Alexis was going to show up with approximately ALL OF THE APPLES OMG.

The recipe is perfect exactly as it was originally posted, though there is one thing I will change the next time I make them. Don't throw anything at me, but I think I'm done with the salted caramel phase. I think maybe I'm ready to just let caramel be caramel and leave the salt behind.

I KNOW.

Since I've already outed myself as a freak, can I just admit I'm done with pumpkin spice everything as well? The magic is gone, y'all. At least for me.

Salted Caramel Apple Bars

Crust
1/2 cup butter, melted
1/4 granulated sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 cup all-purpose flour

Apple Filling
2 large apples, thinly sliced (the peeling thing doesn't seem to matter)
2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
2 tablespoons granulated sugar
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/8 teaspoon all ground nutmeg

Streusel Topping
1/2 cup quick oats
1/3 cup brown sugar
1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1/4 cup butter, cold and cubed
Caramel sauce (Recipe here or just use ice cream topping. I'm not judging your decisions in this matter.)

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Line a 8" pan with foil. Yes, this matters. This stuff sticks, so life is easier if you use foil and can just lift it out.

2. Make the crust. Add the sugar, vanilla, salt, and flour to the melted butter and stir until well combined.

3. Press the crust in the bottom of your pan.

4. Bake for 10 minutes, or however long it takes for you to make the other parts of this masterpiece. (Yes, this is a variance from the original recipe. I accidentally learned that it doesn't matter if you use a bit higher temperature, so I'm rolling with it.)

5. While the crust is baking, toss the sliced apples, flour, sugar, cinnamon, and nutmeg in a large bowl until the apples are well-coated. Set aside.

6. Make the streudel topping stuff by combining the oats, sugar, cinammon, flour, and butter in a large bowl. The butter needs to stay a little chunky, so mesh the ingredients together using your hands.

7. Layer the apples on top of the cooked crust. Press them down until they're nice and level.

8. Layer the streusel on top of the apples.

9. Bake at 350 degrees for 30-35 minutes or until the streusel looks slightly browned.

10. Allow the apple goodness to cool thoroughly before drizzling caramel over top.

11. Enjoy!

Just Two Girls And Their Unicorns