Turning the Page on Second Grade

While we were all busy looking at what the stork dropped off at our house, this happened.

Which, LONGEST SCHOOL YEAR EVER.

(I really hope school administration learned that cancelling due to cold weather causes excess school in June and IT SUCKS.)

The longest school year ever started out looking like this.

So much has changed.

For one thing, the child that started the school year dressed pristinely ended the school year with an entirely different attitude regarding her attire. While she was definitely a member of Team Posh Spice months ago, now Alexis has forgone the perfectly matching shoes and carefully coiffed hair in favor of a Sporty Spice way of life. Now she's all about quick ponytails, leggings, and sensible shoes (because CARTWHEELS! and BACK WALKOVERS!).

This new incarnation of Alexis is far more practical. And, I'm sure, temporary.

This new incarnation is also wiser, more mature, and more aware of the world beyond her doorstep. She cries when she sees a homeless person begging for spare change. She doesn't understand how anyone could ever hurt an animal. She is beginning to understand what she can influence and what is beyond her control.

And she's a big sister now.

Thanks to Mila's appearance, Alexis is now set up for a summer free of camp. She's really very excited about this prospect. It should prove to be interesting as she is expecting Big! Fun! Every! Day! but she's going to find out that life with a newborn isn't all that exciting.

Or maybe it is, if you're Alexis. She is pretty in love with the Tiny Human.

Another chapter in Alexis' life starts now.

Mind you, she's starting it wearing the same shoes she wore on the first day of 1st grade, so maybe things aren't all that different after all.

Somebody Forgot to Tell Smoosh She's Out Now

Why exactly do we bother to name things around here?

Seriously.

Kiara is more commonly referred to as "Kiki" or "Kizashi."

Cody gets called "Biscuit" all of the time.

Even Alexis rarely hears her given name. She has a list of nicknames a mile long, some of which make sense but others are about as logical as that whole "Cody --> Biscuit" thing.

After months and months of turmoil (Most of which was basically, "We should talk about names." "Maybe later."), we settled on a name for the Tiny Human. But, at the rate we're going, she's not going to hear it until she's sitting in a classroom super-confused because a teacher is referring to her by her given name.

Mila Joliette. Mila just because it's awesome and Joliette because we wanted a name that started with "J". We wanted her to be able to go by the nickname "MJ." She won't know that.

Because she's Smoosh.

I mean, seriously.

The child is only happy if she is folded in thirds, rolled up in a ball, and stuffed in someone's pocket.

If you try to straighten her out, she screams. If you pull her legs straight, she screams. If you even imply that maybe she stretch out a bit, run for the ear plugs because she's going to scream.

You can't un-smoosh The Smoosh.

Careful What You Wish For

It's really hard to put into words just how much I love sleep. I love it more than chocolate, days at the beach, dressing my cat up like a dork ... more than pretty much anything. I mean, if you gave me the choice between $1000 cash and a comfy bed with the guarantee of 12 hours of uninterrupted sleep, I seriously do not know which one I would choose.

Who am I kidding? I'd take the sleep. I really would.

I've finally met my match.

This Mila. Man. Girlfriend takes that "be opposite of my sister" thing VERY seriously. I have always known that Alexis is terrible at sleeping, but now that I've witnessed that some newborns close their eyes for more than an hour or two each day, I understand just how bad she is.

Still.

To this day.

Alexis just doesn't need as much sleep as most humans.

Mila more than makes up for it.

You guys, I hit the sleeping newborn lottery. In many ways, I earned it because ALEXIS. To clarify, "Alexis" roughly translates to "creature who is fantastic, except that she hates sleep."

Mila, on the other hand, roughly translates to "sleeeeeeeeeep." That's all she does. When I look back at photos of the girls in a decade or two, I'll be able to tell them apart because Alexis' eyes were always open as a newborn while Mila has to be poked and prodded for an hour before she will open her eyes. Even then, she usually only opens one of them.

She sleeps. And sleeps. And sleeps. It is the most wonderful thing in the world.

Except.

(OF COURSE THERE IS AN "EXCEPT.")

She who sleeps so wonderfully lost more weight in the days after her birth than is considered OK. Then, she wasn't gaining fast enough. We found ourselves aboard the Weight Watch train. When you're aboard that train, you have to make the baby eat at least every four hours.

Which, uh, Mila wants to sleep through the night. Seriously. She went as long as six hours before her pediatrician declared that it was time to start setting alarms and poking her awake for feedings. (Please don't throw things at me if your newborn won't sleep six straight hours. Remember, ALEXIS. I EARNED THIS THE HARD WAY.)

I wanted to punch things SO hard the first time I had to set an alarm and wake that Tiny Human. That time when Mila was just a couple of days old and slept six hours was the first time I had slept more than three consecutive hours in months and months. It was the most glorious thing ever. Then I had to wake the baby on purpose. Like a barbarian.

I absolutely recognized the hilarity of the situation, by the way. All I have wanted for years is a healthy baby who slept. I finally got one and then HAHAHAHAHAHA! WAKE HER UP! OFTEN!

Careful what you wish for. You just might get it, and everything that goes with it.

But! GOOD NEWS! Miss Mila graduated from Weight Watch University today. Along with that came the pediatrician's recommendation that we let the Tiny Human sleep as long as she wants at night.

Even if I have jinxed everything and Mila wakes up every two hours tonight, I will be the winner. I have seen the potential for a full night's sleep and I'm willing to wait however long it takes to get it. This time I know it will eventually happen.

Unless Alexis decides to wake me up.