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For the Birds

To be clear, this kid can burp with more gusto than a grown man with a beer gut the size of Texas.

May18 011

Yes, really. She's very fortunate to have been born in the time that she was born because the whole concept of traditional "ladylike" behaviors would be completely lost on her. She has no chill, no ability to tone it down, and she has no qualms about doing life on her own terms. If she needs to burp, by golly she's going to burp. Loudly. And with a giggle because burping is funny, you guys.

But, here's the thing. Mila calls burping, "birding." As in, she will proudly declare, "I'm going to bird!" and then let out a hefty belch. I didn't really pay attention to the mis-pronunciation because she's three years old and all that. She has LOTS of words that she pronounces aweseomely. It just didn't dawn on me that she meant exactly what she said ...

I caught on recently when Miss Mila wasn't feeling her best. She had an upset tummy which led to all of the worst things. She will happily tell you the story about how she got sick just before she was to the toilet, slipped in her own mess, and landed on her bum. Apparently it was a traumatizing experience because she mentions it often. Every time she mentions it, she throws in some randomness about the "bird."

One of the times that she started carrying on about the "bird," I stepped in and started asking questions. You guys, Mila is absolutely certain that there are birds living in her belly. Burps and puking and belly rumbles and all of those things can be blamed on the birds. If they try to fly? She burps. If they try to get out? Puke. The belly rumbles are the birds building their nest.

She's for real.

And yet, she still likes birds. A lot.

Which is interesting because the other kid in this house has a for real phobia of birds and always has, even though they've never moved into her belly or done anything to hurt her. Mila, on the other hand, is all, "We can be friends!" even though a bird apparently has taken up residence in her stomach.

Do you know how hard I'm going to laugh when Mila eventually starts threatening Alexis with the birds in her tummy? I CAN'T WAIT.

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Reader Comments (2)

This is one of my favorite stories/posts from you ever. What a wonderful memory to be able to share with Mila when she is older.

May 16, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterKathy

How exactly did the birds get in her tummy. And that is the best explanation for gas I have ever heard. Your kids rock!

May 16, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMary
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