One. Cheerio. At. A. Time.

I'm not a morning person. That's probably one of the biggest understatements I've said in the past year. Let's just say that I'm at my best once the clock hits double digits.

Mila is worse.

She's not as mean in the morning as I am, but she's nowhere near as functional. I can manage to get in the shower and out the door. She can't manage to do anything. Getting her out the door in the morning requires reminding her every three seconds that she's supposed to be doing something and FOCUS, CHILD.

Meh.

This week has been especially delightful. I've got a thing at work this week that requires I be there early, which is basically an invitation for Mila to be extra special. She has spent the entire week testing to see how long one human can take to eat a bowl of Cheerios. BTW, when you HAVE to eat the Cheerios one Cheerio at a time, the answer is

OH

EM

GEE.

HOW

IS

THIS

POSSIBLE.

Rome was built in less time than it takes Mila to eat her breakfast. I could start her at 9:00 pm the night before and she still wouldn't be ready at 7:00 am because SERIOUSLY HOW DOES SHE EAT SO SLOWLY.

And don't remind her to hurry up. She stops to listen to what you're saying and it takes her a few minutes to resume.

So if you need me in the morning, no worries. I"ll just be over here researching the world record on slowest breakfast eater because if we're going to be overachievers, we should at least get recognition for it.

Comments

[Kate]

I'll take your One Cheerio At A Time and raise you one Lick The Butter Off The Waffle And Throw It To The Dog and one Pretend To Eat Waffle For Forty Minutes Then Put Half A Waffle In Mom's Pocket Because There's No Food Allowed On The School Bus.