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Tuesday
Apr302019

Placing My Bets

Four things are going to happen this week:

1. Mila is going to give a momma bird a heart attack that will result in her eggs being abandoned because the child absolutely refuses to stop climbing up to a nest in one of our bushes. SHE IS OBSESSED. She's also not scared of the momma bird, so when it flies out at her face, she's all, "HI! WHAT'S UP? LET'S BE FRIENDSSSSSS!"

The whole scene has caused Alexis to scream like the first girl to die in every horror flick ever approximately 15 times. She's still mortified by all things bird-like.

2. Alexa is going to learn to say, "GO AWAY, MILA." Mila is on a "Count to 100" bender which is all fun and games until she makes you join her and then does it 24352309562 times. Alexis figured out that Alexa could probably stand in for us and, thus, a beautiful relationship began. Alexa will count to 100 more than 5 times in a row without complaining. Can she make it to 10? Mila is going to find out.

3. I AM GOING TO DUCT TAPE MILA'S MOUTH SHUT. She has decided she can talk to me the way a teenager might talk to her mother, but on those days when she wants to risk her life by rolling her eyes and dishing out WAY too much attitude. So. Much. Mouthing. Off.

I can't deal.

4. Mila's going to re-remember how to match her clothing. The thing is that the only reason Mila is still a member of society is that she's on a mismatched clothing spree. It's so darn adorable when she pairs things that are awful together. Today was blue unicorn leggings, a pink tutu, a grey cat t-shirt, unicorn shoes, and neon loopy hair clips. None of it worked together and it was glorious.

Tomorrow is school picture day. Will the streak continue? Will she choose a matching outfit? She's capable. Sometimes she nails the fashion mission, other days she wears a red tutu with her green t-ball t-shirt. WHAT VERSION WILL I GET?

I'm betting she matches. Mostly I'm voting that because mismatched would make for AMAZING photos and we all know she can't give me that. See also: she's super being a jerk this week.

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