We Really Need to Elsa It

It's amazing the things that kids absolutely refuse to forget. Alexis brings up old news all of the time, but Mila. MILA.

Mila holds grudges like WOAH.

Months ago ... before Christmas ... I bought Mila an LOL Surprise Doll. As often happens, the new toy became her most favorite thing in the world and she insisted on taking it with her EVERYWHERE. It's a frequent war we fight - I tell her to leave things in the car and she decides she's willing to die on that hill. Eventually I give in (because seriously, she is willing to die on that hill), but I do it with a, "Don't complain to me if you lose it!"

Guess what happened.

In the mall.

The little purse that the LOL Doll belonged in apparently wasn't intended to actually hold the doll inside, because it fell out and nobody noticed. Mila and I hadn't gone very far, but we weren't successful in finding her. We retraced our steps, checked the lost and found, and genuinely gave it our best effort.

I knew then exactly what happened. We really hadn't gone far, so it was clear that someone had picked it up. Those dumb things are expensive considering how little plastic is involved, so I wasn't surprised. I'm not a total idiot, though, so I didn't tell Mila that someone else had probably picked it up and kept it. That wasn't a fight that was worth fighting.

Fast forward to this week. We have listened to Mila complain about her missing doll about 2351730498120 times. Every time we set foot in that mall, she starts looking for it all over again and basically the whole thing is dumb. I want to tell Mila to "Elsa that nonsense" but I suspect she won't get that I so very badly want her to let it go.

But, for real, this was the 2351730498120th time she had whined about the missing LOL doll, and I was SO VERY OVER IT. I decided to bring on the Toy Story theme and ask Mila if she thought the doll was a lost toy.

I KNOW. IT WAS A DUMB THING TO SAY. I DON'T NEED YOU TO TELL ME.

One thing led to another and suddenly Mila realized that the doll wasn't a lost toy, but rather that someone had taken it. "She already had a home with meeeee!" Mila wailed. "I'm very mad at the girl who took my doll!" she continued. "It's not nice to a lost toy home when it's not yours!"

The kid served up a heaping side of bitter with every word she said. She. Was. Pissed.

And then Alexis made it worse. Alexis just had to bring on more Disney magic and throw out that maybe we could buy another one on eBay and ZOMG MILA WON'T STOP. She spent basically the rest of the day asking everyone to check eBay for her lost toy and if you see me go all sorts of Wreck It Ralph in public in the next few days, that's why.

I can't even with the LOL doll anymore.