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I Feel a Battle Brewing, Part 2

So, how did Project I Will Not Be Broken go, you wonder? Well, Alexis was in her own little bed between the hours of 9:00 pm and 5:00 am. In fact, she didn't wind up in our bed until 5:07.

For the record, Mr. Husband gets up at 5:20. I get up at 6:20. When the screaming started at 5:07, I knew my choices were to get up and be up for the rest of the day, or bring her back to bed with me and hope she fell asleep in less than 13 minutes. I chose the latter and she cooperated. I consider that part of the story to be the successful part.

What was not successful was what happened between 9 and 5. There was only one awakening, but boy, oh boy, it was a doozy. At precisely 12:04 am, Not-Sleeping Beauty began the yelling.




I ignored her. It's really not that hard to do when you know there is absolutely nothing wrong with your child. Besides, I've been down this path before. I mentioned yesterday that Alexis occasionally hits a phase where she thinks she needs to see me in the middle of the night. It has always been easy to cure: Ignore her. She will fuss for no more than 20 minutes, go to sleep, and the phase will pass for at least a month. It's really just a matter of having my wits about me enough to know that she should be ignored.

Last night 20 minutes turned into 30 minutes. That turned into 40 minutes. Then 50. Then 60. Alexis carried on and on and on, alternating between yelling the boss's official title and calling for her Daddy. Daddy, of course, slept through the whole thing. Never heard a single peep. I even hurled a Bulldog at him at one point (OK, it was more like a shove of her rump in hopes that she would head in his general direction), but that backfired when she came trumbling back to me and plopped down on my stomach.

All the while, I stayed in my cozy bed and buried my head under a pillow. Until I heard, "Mommy, I need my pants."

THAT got me out of bed instantly. As any of you that have provided shelter to strippers know, needing pants might very well be Toddler-speak for "I'm not wearing a diaper and I'm going to drop a deuce right here in my bed just so you won't get another millisecond of sleep for the rest of the night!"

Fortunately, she really had just lost her pants. I would guess that she was trying to climb out of her crib, which I like to call Sona (if you get that reference, you and I really can be bestest friends forever, just so long as you remember that Wentworth is MINE ALL MINE I SAW HIM FIRST HE'S MINE). She cannot break out of that crib no matter how hard she tries, but all of her attempts seemed to have caused her flannel Dora bottoms to sink to the depths of her floor.

Alexis' room is the coldest place in our entire house. If you ever need to chill a frosty beverage, skip the fridge and freezer, head straight to her room where I can guarantee it will be frozen in no time. Walking on her floor is like walking on a sheet of ice all year round. I've never quite figured out what the problem is back there, but I have figured out that you can't just pick a pair of pajama bottoms up off the floor and stick them on the Toddler unless you want her to politely inform you that her little ham hocks are a wee bit chilly. So I snagged the pants, I snagged the Toddler, and together we all sat down in the chair. By the time her pants were warmed up enough to put them on, Alexis was fast asleep in my arms.

Total amount of time that I know I was awake: 2 hours 13 minutes.

So tonight, my dear Alexis, we will fight the battle once again. I know that giving in right now will result in a Toddler trying to permanently move into my bed, so I will not be broken.

We shall see who is more stubborn once and for all.

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Reader Comments (35)

Good luck tonight! I hope we both get some sleep tonight. Last night, after being up for 3 hours, I woke hubby up - I figured it was his turn (plus I had to get plans together so I could take off work today to take the screaming one to the doctor).

If you have an all in one sleeper, I would suggest trying that tonight so she can't get those pants off. Or a good stiff drink to knock her out!

Good luck tonight with phase two!

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterPam

I think last night was the first time in a month that she wasn't wearing footy pajamas. Go figure.

Good luck to you, too, Pam!

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBurgh Baby's Mom

Oh hun, I feel your pain. We lost this battle with our daughter after our last move across the country to our tiny apt. She now has a toddler bed permanently situated in our bedroom....We're hoping venture back into this territory when we move again in Feb *sign*......Hope tonight goes well! May the force be with you ;)

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSandy C.

ARGH! I feel your sleep deprived pain. Boy-Child#2 was a pill. Good luck tonight! Hey, maybe you'll be so tired you WILL sleep through it and your husband will hurl a bulldog at you? LOL!

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTootsie Farklepants

I did think of you last night because Baby was up at 3:30am screaming. She didn't wake up once in the night the entire two weeks the big kids had off for winter break. This morning I had to be up at 6:30am. Not the night to pick sweetie! She was awake for exactly 43 minutes. It could have been worse.

Baby's room is freezing cold too. We finally set up a portable heater in there and that seems to keep it warm enough for her to sleep (most nights).

Good luck tonight! You know she's wearing footies tonight.

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKIDZMAMA

Could have been worse, Kidzmama, but could have been better. Why do they wait until you have to be up in the morning? I swear it's a conspiracy amongst kids. They want us to ALL be sleep-deprived so that we will be weak-minded and give them their way more easily.

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBurgh Baby's Mom

Here's hoping the little smarty doesn't grasp the concept that no pants = mommy comes running.

You go, bulldog hurling mommy! Maybe you could put Meg in the crib with her. They could keep each other company, and share warmth.

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

Ack! I'm shuddering her for you. I remember the all encompassing frustration that sleep problems bring with them. Is it possible to leave a picture book or some small toy for her to play with until she fades off to sleep again?

Here's hoping that tonight is the night.

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

Did I write this post in my sleep? You'll have to remind me to tell you about the time I woke in the middle of the night to find Punkin pantsless, diaperless and soaking wet (with PEE!) on the sofa. Granted, it was all my fault, but still!

And Punkin's room is easily the coldest in the house.

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMadame Queen

Oh man, sounds like you need a nap...Good luck tonight!

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterNap Warden

I am simply amazed at how you're able to function. I'd have been committed by now! They would've locked me up at Western Psych and thrown away the key...

I so hope you have a better night tonight.

And tomorrow night, and the night after....

And in the event that you don't, just remember that in the 2 hours and 13 minutes that you're awake, I'll be right up with you, peeing 17 times in a row and spending the majority of the night sleeping upright thanks to the heartburn that's slowly (but surely) setting in. God help us....

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterluckysevn

Luckysevn--Are you hinting at what I think you're hinting at? If so, 1) you are CRAZY and 2) Congratulations!

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBurgh Baby's Mom

My toddler likes to take his pull up off in the night and then proceed to pee in the bed and then informs me about it. Good luck with tonight, hopefully we both will be able to sleep.

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTammy

Man! It really does pass. And you really will win this one. A little hot toddy for Alexis ...

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterFlea

Oh I know how you feel. Luckily my now 2 1/2 year old has seemed to gotten in a much better sleep routine. I used to think that, being my third, I would be much less concerned about every noise she made and she would, therefore, sleep better because she would quickly learn to put herself back to sleep.

That did NOT happen. She nursed every night, a few times a night until WAY past one year. She, once she stopped nursing, she still woke up every night, just for fun, for another year.

Just think, your daughter WILL outgrow this. She will not be 16 and crying for you, she will be 16 and will want to sleep 12 hours completely uninterrupted. Seems unbelievable right now, doesn't it?

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterIrene

Oh no.... not just hinting! I am full-on crazy and 4 months pregnant... My kids will be 21 months apart (assuming the Player Yet to Be Named makes an appearance 5 weeks early the Monkey did). Does that count as Irish twins???

Now about that room in Western Psych... I'd like a view of the Cathedral, please! ;-)

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterluckysevn

Ah, good times. We're not having night problems with BigBrother. Just nap problems. Woe is me.

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterFireMom

I honestly think I saw Wentworth first, as I have watched it at the edge of my couch since the previews for the first episode. I have found another love though, Jonathan Ryes Myers, (I think that's how you spell it), so I guess you can have him.
Good luck tonight!

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJen

Oh, my goodness Burgh! What to do? What to do? I think you need to take a valium and maybe throw the bulldog Alexis' way when she needs so companionship. Or else, kick daddy dear in the nads and tell him it's his turn tonight.

GoOd LuCk! I'm rooting for team Steelers. (that'd be you.)

Keeping my fingers crossed that tonight, you both get some sleep!

Love your blog and thanks for stopping by my page!

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMango Marie

This is the first time I've been on your blog, but it's been way fun looking around. Here's to sweet dreams tonight!!

January 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

Oh my God, I can't help it! I am just cracking up over here! I lost it at the pants. Absolutely lost it. Cannot. Stop. Laughing.

*succumbs to giggling fit*

Ahem. Okay. I'm sorry, my dear. I do hope you get some more sleep than that tonight.

*back to giggling fit*

January 4, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterjayna

Apparently, you've (possibly Alexis) been sending some non-sleep vibes out to Arizona....

Bug has ended up in my bed every night this week. Granted, I don't actually realize it, and Coach wakes him enough to tell him to go back to his own bed, but still!

Between the ongoing night terrors, and the recent development of sleep walking.... that kid may NEVER spend the entire night in his own bed again!

January 4, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterThe Sports Mama

Sports Mama--I hope last night was better. You did manage to remind me why it's important to fight the battle now ;-)

As for us, last night was better. I still wouldn't call it a success, but at least nobody lost their pants. (Go back to giggling, Jayna!)

January 4, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBurgh Baby's Mom

Oh man. That does sound like a battle. Hopefully she won't start taking her pants off on purpose now.
Have you tried a little space heater in her room? Our entire upstairs is cold, as we live in an old house and the vents just don't shoot out the hot air like they do downstairs. Anyway, my hubby always says that the one we have is SUPER safe. It has a temperature setting so you can set it so it goes on when the room gets to a certain cold temp and turns off when it gets to the desired temp. It also has auto shutoff if for some reason it should tip over.
ANYWAY, I hope your sleep problems get better quickly. We are going through bad sleep problems over here because of the holiday crazy no-schedule thing. Last night was a doozy for us too.
Good luck!

January 4, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKathryn

Yeesh woman! Good luck tonight! I hope it goes easier for you.
My DH is like that too. Sleep through a blasted tornado of kids.
Why are kids rooms the coldest rooms in the house? What is with that? Argh.

January 4, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

Trust me she will NOT permanently move into your bed. My 14 year old would never even want to sleep in the same room as us. BTW, my daughter has the coldest room in the house, too. It helps to keep her door open and we bought her an electric blanket. My husband thinks it's so cold because it's the side of the house that the wind blows, the west side.

January 4, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMaria

i'm still trying to get my 4 year old to sleep in his own bed...with pj's on! he is going to join a nudist colony, as soon as he is old enough!
anyway...good luck tonight. once you get her to sleep through...i'm moving in with you, ok?

January 4, 2008 | Unregistered Commentersuchsimplepleasures

Suchsimplepleasures--C'mon over! I'm sure we can find space somewhere. Perhaps in the Dutch Oven?

January 4, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBurgh Baby's Mom

wow...I was all rootin' "goooo BBM! you're doing it!" until she yelled "I need pants". That was hysterical!

oh, and good job on tossing the dog on the hubby...I do that too.

January 4, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterColleen

Little Man says he's rushing over to Pittsburgh (which is huge, he is an 8th generation Texan, you know) to teach her to add the words "Help meeeeeeeee!" after the "Moooooooomy".

This is the first step in the 8-step process he's developed on how to make your parents go insane from lack of sleep.

January 4, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCatwoman

Catwoman--That is chocolate Frosty I just spit out all over my computer. Thanks for the chuckle!

January 4, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBurgh Baby's Mom

Amy lays in bed crying "Muh-muh-muuuuuummy". I can't leave her to cry too long or she A) vomits everywhere (can you see why CIO has never worked?) or B) gets out of bed and comes and cries next to my head.

I generally just feed (helps that she is alot littler than Alexis!) and then she is back asleep after 20mins.

Also, Amy would like to know, does Alexis want to join her Revolution?

January 4, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterVeronica

I so feel you on this have NO idea. Good luck tonight and tomorrow and the day after that. And if you come up with some amazing solution to this problem, PLEASE share it!!

January 4, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCecily R

Oh, my! I have been following your bedtime battles and I feel for you, I really do. But, speaking from experience, if you stick to your guns for 2-3 nights, she'll stop waking up.

Incidentally, my husband, too, can sleep through ANYTHING and I have always been jealous of that gift.

Good luck tonight, and God bless!

January 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBia

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