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Tuesday
Feb072017

Paybacks, Man

I am incredibly patient with my friend Karma. I really can count on her to make things right, it just takes time.

For the record, sometimes she comes after me. She's just making things right when she does that, though. It's fine.

It's also fine when she goes after my girls. They certainly haven't been totally innocent in their lives, so I maybe sort of enjoy it when Karma pays them back for their sins.

Hi, Alexis.

Alexis has spent her entire life stealing from me. She's sort of getting better these days, but if you go back to when she was a toddler, GAH. If I had food, she would look at me with wide eyes and sweetly beg until I handed it over to her. If I had a drink, she would innocently blink at me until I passed it her way. Then she would chew my straw until it was impossible to continue drinking that drink before she would hand it back and go back to trying to steal my food.

I always knew Karma would find her for all of that. I kind-of-sort-of-maybe looked forward to that day in the distant future when she would call me to complain about her own kids doing the exact same thing. Oh, how I would laugh and laugh and laugh. It was going to be great.

Even greater is that I didn't have to wait for that phone call because Mila. MILA! Mila is Karma's best friend because she walks around paying people back for all they've done in the past. Considering she is literally a Tiny Human, she can do an amazing job of making people pay.

Today the girls managed to talk me into running to Starbucks. Then they continued to gang up on me and demand frappucinos. I'm not THAT nice, so I bought them one to share instead of each their own.

Guess who wouldn't share.

And guess who chewed that straw until it was closed up tight.

And guess who was sooooooo very annoyed.

I couldn't stop laughing. Alexis whined and complained and generally acted the fool because she was all of the annoyed that Mila did all the things that Alexis once did.

I love you, Karma.

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